Thursday, May 31, 2012

lost things.

i learned young, if you want to find something, you’ve got to stop looking for it. they are after all lost things. they reappear often when you least expect them to, when you least need them to.

this applies for everything. the law of attraction is fucking weird. the more we think of something, the more it flees from within our reach or comes at us in high velocities — we begin to start losing ourselves.

just like, disappearing is never a solution: the more you want to vanish, the larger the aptitude is for the demons to find us.

it’s the basic law of attraction: if you want to run from something — it will always catch up, and find it’s way back to you. it will seep into the tiny crevices of your soul’s opening. you can run, you can jump on trains, change your appearance, burn your identification, and take a plane ride out of town but what you want to erase is etched into you. it is already in your bloodstream, it is the fear laced into your thoughts.

just like, lost keys have a way of reappearing a few days later — but when you’re busy cursing God and running late to that meeting, you don’t think “i should stop looking” because you’re convinced you will find them — except you don’t. you give in to defeat and walk to that meeting instead, your entire day a mess. when you misplace your favourite piece of jewelry, isn’t it often you’ll find it, in some forgotten place somewhere?

it’s the same thing with people. with love. when you let someone go, either they come back and find you, when you’ve given up on them. rarely we find them ourselves. they can be categorized as lost things, especially when you spot them sitting in the corner of your favourite coffee shop, reading your favourite copy of Neruda poems. just then, your heart skips a beat, the blood rushes to your head. do you run to them and scream “i found you” or keep standing there — they sense your energy and look up, smiling a smile that pulses right through you.

is this chance? fate? or are all lost things just meant to be found.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

bad things happen in sequences.

there is nothing more beautiful than having the stillness of your breath being the only sound to count on, it truly is the only constant in our lives. by letting the oxygen pump life in me, i understand the veins in my wrists are at my mercy. i enjoy, giving this heart a silent beating by repressing all it’s desires and wants.

pretending to plaster that smile across your face, when all you want to do is grab a bottle of wine and chug it until your guts are churning. then charmingly scream “fuck everything”. i feel like a black hole lately. i haven’t turned to the bottle though — which is good. my head is pounding, my heart is raw from the emotional beatings i’ve been giving myself.

bad things always happen in sequences. it’s never just “oh, hey your cat just died”. your fucking dog has to die too. then, you keep getting lost even with a map of directions to the place you’re going or you lose your favourite Chanel wallet with all your identification, and can’t even go buy a pack of cigarettes because the clerk can’t tell you’re over 19 years old. i am 25, i can strip myself naked and show my battle scars, i wear them like a layer of skin but they swear “you don’t look a day older than 17.”

tragedy and misery follows me wherever i go. it’s like that demon from paranormal activity that goes with the girl no matter where she moves. that’s how misery is for me. i can burn pictures, change my clothes, show my pearly whites to every stranger who looks my way — but with me remains what is haunting me.

bad things happen in sequences — yet somehow i manage to scrape by. that’s how my life has always been — i manage. it’s never, “i got out of it with everything intact” i often need to leave pieces of my spirit behind, the gashes in my soul are invisible.

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i wrote this today. it got featured on tumblr! follow me: http://the-peony.tumblr.com

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

I love the 50mm.


I was bored so I took pictures. The henna is from my best friends wedding from the long weekend. Unfortunately, I ended up getting sick during the festivities, and I have been sick for the past week or so, and all I've wanted to do is sleep. But the sad thing is I have to wake up early everyday and won't get to sleep in until the weekend :( I am going to bed at a reasonable time tonight.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Tears of Mehndi

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to photograph the Tears of Mehndi book launch on the weekend of May 6th, 2012. My cousin, Raminder Sidhu wrote the novel. The book is available at the Chapters closest to you . It can be ordered online from Amazon.ca or Amazon.com. It's also available in the United Kingdom and in India. To become a fan on facebook, click here. If you missed the book signing at Chapters, fear not there is another one at Black Bond Books in Guildford Mall on May 26th, 2012 @ 1 pm.

A courageous and timely novel, Tears of Mehndi explores the rich, complex and often heartbreaking lives of a tight-knit community in Vancouver’s Little India. Through the perspectives of several women whose lives intertwine over a generation, Raminder Sidhu deftly exposes the shrouded violence within the Indo-Canadian community, a difficult and often dissembled subject. Sidhu’s characters are women caught between two cultures, struggling to understand the traditions they are obliged to follow while still embracing and often welcoming the fundamentally different values of the West.
Also, I was the event photographer. One of the pictures I took was published in the Punjabi Patrika newspaper, which is an East-Indian weekly paper. It's kind of a big deal for me because this is the first time I've ever been published! Not to mention it gets me a ton of new business.


To visit my website: www.jkdphotography.ca
To become a fan of my facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/JKDPhotography

Sunday, May 20, 2012

I'm back.

Hi folks.


So, I'm back to the blogspotting world after a long hiatus. I used to be http://amouretlafoi.blogspot.com. I am Jazzy! I thought I would have a flurry of amazing thoughts to share with ya'll but I'm suddenly blank. I promise I'll write something tomorrow.

Happy Sunday!